Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Let me barf now

Names have been removed to protect the guilty.

A coherent brand strategy is important to the success of all of our businesses. The ... brand has represented a strong, trusted partner to many customers and consumers around the world.

While the statement above is filled with unimportant platitudes, it's not bad enough. Here's my rewrite:

The brand forms the linchpin of our interactions with consumers. To ensure optimum interaction between content providers and consumers, it is important that a coherent brand strategy be generated. Promotion of coherence will provide benefits to all stakeholders, thus ensuring that the corporation can accomplish its core objectives. Such a coherent brand strategy will also build upon the goodwill and equity that have become attached to the brand via the corporation's worldwide activities.

If you want to obfuscate some more, please feel free to do so in the comments. Or on FriendFeed.

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