So, which NFL quarterback will date which Hollywood starlet?

The Sports Rumors links to an article in Epic Carnival:

Following her arrest for driving under the influence and in possession of several grams of cocaine, Cincinnati Bengals coach Marvin Lewis has offered refuge to troubled starlet Lindsay Lohan on his 53-person NFL roster, signing Lohan to a 7-year, $53 million deal.

"Her ability to blow a 0.12 two weeks out of rehab shows some great potential," said Bengals Director of Football Operations Jim Lippincott. "We're taking a less conventional approach to scouting. After all our success turning high-profile athletes into criminals, we're going to try to turn high-profile criminals into athletes. It makes sense on paper."

Meanwhile, Michael Vick has been dropped by two shoe companies:

Facing protests from animal-rights groups, Nike announced it was suspending Vick's endorsement deal without pay, as well as halting sales of Vick-related shoes and other products at its retail stores.

Reebok, the official uniform supplier of the NFL, said it would stop selling Vick's replica jersey at retail stores and through its Web site.

OK, technically the Reebok deal isn't a shoe deal. But it's still impressive to get dropped by two shoe companies in one day. Kobe won't ever top that.

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